Prank Call!

At the request of my bro-ham, I will be calling the University of Michigan admissions office on Friday with a series of obnoxious and ridiculous questions to piss off his friend that works there. So far the suggestions for questions include:
"I know that because of Proposal 2, michigan no longer accepts people of color. but do they still take people with brown hair?"

"say i have a 1600 SAT and a 3.9 high school GPA. do i have ANY chance of getting in?" in a really panicky voice
followed up by: "but what if i don't apply? can i still get in?"

"What do i write in the essay part?"

Do you folks have any suggestions? I'll record and post the call for further hilarity.